11/21/2004 08:15:00 PM|W|P|aliencam|W|P|
HA HAHA HA HAHAHA
aliencam|W|P|110109332411453995|W|P||W|P|cameronk@gmail.com11/17/2004 10:25:00 PM|W|P|aliencam|W|P|okay i'm really mad because i lost my entire 3 page post of sites i had found and not bookmarked... since when does right-clicking on ONE IE window's taskbar icon and going to close close ALL of ie??? I HATE IE!!! YOU CAN DIE FOREVER IE!!!! thank you. that is all. not really... a link i ofund shortly after loosing my 3 pages of inks... http://www-personal.umd.umich.edu/~nhughes/htmldocs/lab.html 50 WAYS TO CONFUSE, WORRY, OR JUST SCARE THE BEJEEZUS OUT OF PEOPLE IN THE COMPUTER LAB -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream "Oh my God! They've found me!" and bolt. Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you. When your computer is turned off, complain to the monitor on duty that you can't get the damn thing to work. After he/she's turned it on, wait 5 minutes,turn it off again, & repeat the process for a good half hour. Type frantically, often stopping to look at the person next to you evilly. Before anyone else is in the lab, connect each computer to different screen than the one it's set up with. Write a program that plays the "Smurfs" theme song and play it at the highest volume possible over & over again. Work normally for a while. Suddenly look amazingly startled by something on the screen and crawl underneath the desk. Ask the person next to you if they know how to tap into top-secret Pentagon files. Use Interactive Send to make passes at people you don't know. Make a small ritual sacrifice to the computer before you turn it on. Bring a chainsaw, but don't use it. If anyone asks why you have it, say "Just in case..." mysteriously. Type on VAX for a while. Suddenly start cursing for 3 minutes at everything bad about your life. Then stop and continue typing. Enter the lab, undress, and start staring at other people as if they're crazy while typing. Light candles in a pentagram around your terminal before starting. Ask around for a spare disk. Offer $2. Keep asking until someone agrees. Then, pull a disk out of your fly and say, "Oops, I forgot." Every time you press Return and there is processing time required, pray "Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease," and scream "YES!" when it finishes. "DISK FIGHT!!!" Start making out with the person at the terminal next to you (It helps if you know them, but this is also a great way to make new friends). Put a straw in your mouth and put your hands in your pockets. Type by hitting the keys with the straw. If you're sitting in a swivel chair, spin around singing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" whenever there is processing time required. Draw a pictue of a woman (or man) on a piece of paper, tape it to your monitor. Try to seduce it. Act like it hates you and then complain loudly that women (men) are worthless. Try to stick a Ninetendo cartridge into the 3 1/2 disc drive, when it doesn't work, get the supervisor. When you are on an IBM, and when you turn it on, ask loudly where the smiling Apple face is when you turn on one of those. Print out the complete works of Shakespeare, then when its all done (two days later) say that all you wanted was one line. Sit and stare at the screen, biting your nails noisely. After doing this for a while, spit them out at the feet of the person next to you. Stare at the screen, grind your teeth, stop, look at the person next to you. Grinds some more. Repeat procedure, making sure you never provoke the person enough to let them blow up, as this releases tension, and it is far more effective to let them linger. If you have long hair, take a typing break, look for split ends, cut them and deposit them on your neighbor's keyboard as you leave. Put a large, gold-framed portrait of the British Royal Family on your desk and loudly proclaim that it inspires you. Come to the lab wearing several layers of socks. Remove shoes and place them of top of the monitor. Remove socks layer by layer and drape them around the monitor. Exclaim sudden haiku about the aesthetic beauty of cotton on plastic. Take the keyboard and sit under the computer. Type up your paper like this. Then go to the lab supervisor and complain about the bad working conditions. Laugh hysterically, shout "You will all perish in flames!!!" and continue working. Bring som dry ice & make it look like your computer is smoking. Assign a musical note to every key (ie. the Delete key is A Flat, the B key is F sharp, etc.). Whenever you hit a key, hum its note loudly. Write an entire pape this way. Attempt to eat your computer's mouse. Borrow someone else's keyboard by reaching over, saying "Excuse me, mind if I borrow this for a sec?", unplugging the keyboard & taking it. Bring in a bunch of magnets and have fun. When doing calculations, pull out an abacus and say that sometimes the old ways are best. Play Pong for hours on the most powerful computer in the lab. Make a loud noise of hitting the same key over and over again until you see that your neighbor is noticing (You can hit the space bar so your fill isn't affected). Then look at your neighbor's keyboard. Hit his/her delete key several times, erasing an entire word. While you do this, ask: "Does *your* delete key work?" Shake your head, and resume hitting the space bar on your keyboard. Keep doing this until you've deleted about a page of your neighbor's document. Then, suddenly exclaim: "Well, whaddya know? I've been hitting the space bar this whole time. No wonder it wasn't deleting! Ha!" Print out your document and leave. Remove your disk from the drive and hide it. Go to the lab monitor and complain that your computer ate your disk. (For special effects, put some Elmer's Glue on or around the disk drive. Claim that the computer is drooling.) Stare at the person's next to your's screen, look really puzzled, burst out laughing, and say "You did that?" loudly. Keep laughing,grab your stuff and leave, howling as you go. Point at the screen. Chant in a made up language while making elaborate hand gestures for a minute or two. Press return or the mouse, then leap back and yell "COVEEEEERRRRRR!" peek up from under the table, walk back to the computer and say. "Oh, good. It worked this time," and calmly start to type again. Keep looking at invisible bugs and trying to swat them. See who's online. Send a total stranger a talk request. Talk to them like you've known them all your lives. Hangup before they get a chance to figure out you're a total stranger. Bring an small tape player with a tape of really absurd sound effects. Pretend it's the computer and look really lost. Pull out a pencil. Start writing on the screen. Complain that the lead doesn't work. Come into the computer lab wearing several endangered species of flowers in your hair. Smile incessantly. Type a sentence, then laugh happily, exclaim "You're such a marvel!!", and kiss the screen. Repeat this after every sentence. As your ecstasy mounts, also hug the keyboard. Finally, hug your neighbor, then the computer assistant, and walk out. Run into the computer lab, shout "Armageddon is here!!!!!", then calmly sit down and begin to type. Quietly walk into the computer lab with a Black and Decker chainsaw, rev that baby up, and then walk up to the nearest person and say, "Give me that computer or you'll be feeding my pet crocodile for the next week". Two words: Tesla Coil. hahahahaahahaha thats great. not as great as some of the stuff ihad earlier, but good enough... and for naother joke! http://forums.overclockersclub.com/?showtopic=38043 One day, in line at the cafeteria, Bob says to Stanley behind him, "My elbow hurts like everything. I guess I better see a doctor." "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Stan replies. "There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer'll tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars...a lot cheaper than a doctor." So Bob deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart. He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Jack began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap.water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and some water out of his favorite fishing hole for good measure. Bob hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and waits. The computer prints the following: 1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. 2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. 3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab... 4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. 5. If you don't stop fishing, your elbow will never get better. And, as always, thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart i don't really get it, but yeah... i'm really nanoyed so im not goign to write anythign today..... "Blessed are the young for they shal inherit the national debt" -some founding father ro president guy who's name i forgot because it was on one of the pages i had in this list that i LOST BECAUSE I HATE IE!!!! thank you. that will be all -aliencam |W|P|110075598780868470|W|P||W|P|cameronk@gmail.com11/16/2004 07:47:00 PM|W|P|aliencam|W|P|No one makes jokes in base 13!!! .... or do they... (as taken from wikipedia entry for "The Answer to Life, The Universe, and Everything" http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Answer_to_Life,_the_Universe,_and_Everything ) The answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe and Everything, given by the supercomputer Deep Thought to a group of mice, is "forty-two". According to the Guide, mice are 3-dimensional profiles of a pan-dimensional, hyper-intelligent race of beings. They built Deep Thought, the second greatest computer of all time and space, to tell them the answer to the question of life, the universe and everything. After seven and a half million years the computer divulges the answer: forty-two. "Forty-two!" yelled Loonquawl. "Is that all you've got to show for seven and a half million years' work?" "I checked it very thoroughly," said the computer, "and that quite definitely is the answer. I think the problem, to be quite honest with you, is that you've never actually known what the question is." The computer informs the researchers that it will design for them a second and greater computer, incorporating living beings as part of its computational matrix, to tell them what the question is. That computer was called Earth and was so big that it was often mistaken for a planet. The question was lost minutes before it was due to be produced, due to the Vogons' demolition of the Earth, supposedly to build a hyperspace bypass. (Later in the series, it is revealed that the Vogons had been hired to destroy the Earth by a consortium of philosophers and psychiatrists who feared for their jobs should the meaning of life become common knowledge.) Already booked for a round of talk-show appearances to reveal the Question, the mice become desperate to discover it. During a meeting with Arthur Dent and his companions on the planet Magrathea, Frankie and Benjy mouse reveal a plan to extract the ultimate question from Arthur's brain. Since this involves removing and dicing his brain, Arthur is unwilling to go along with the plan. He manages to escape from them unscathed. Lacking a real answer, the mice proposed to use "How many roads must a man walk down?" (the first line of Bob Dylan's famous civil rights song Blowin' in the Wind) as the question for talk shows, after considering and rejecting the question, "What's yellow and dangerous?"�actually a riddle whose answer, not given by Adams, is "Shark-infested custard". However, this may also refer to the Vogon Constructor Fleet that demolished Earth, in that they were yellow and most certainly dangerous. At the end of the book The Restaurant at the End of the Universe (volume 2 of the Hitchhiker's trilogy), Arthur Dent (as the last human to have left the Earth before its destruction, and therefore the portion of the computer matrix most likely to hold the question) attempts to discover the Question by extracting it from his unconscious mind, through pulling Scrabble letters at random out of a sack. The result is the sentence "WHAT DO YOU GET IF YOU MULTIPLY SIX BY NINE". "Six by nine. Forty-two." "That's it. That's all there is." Since 6 � 9 = 54, this being the question would imply that the universe is bizarre and irrational; on the other hand, there is no proof that this was the actual question. After all, Arthur Dent comprised only a minuscule fragment of the vast and complex computer matrix that was the Earth, and besides, it was stated that the computer's run had not finished when it was destroyed. In addition, Arthur and Ford realized that the original ape-like inhabitants of Earth were displaced by the Golgafrinchams, which could account for the irrational nature of the question in Arthur's mind (as he himself is a descendant of the Golgafrinchans). However, it was later pointed out that 6 � 9 = 42 if the calculations are performed in base 13, not base 10. Douglas Adams was not aware of this at the time, and has since been quoted as saying that "nobody writes jokes in base 13." and also "I may be a pretty sad person, but I don't make jokes in base 13." (Note, however, that the Scrabble board Arthur used had thirteen squares to a side, whereas an actual Scrabble board has fifteen, as well as having four Y tiles to actual Scrabble's two.) In the original radio series, this scene occurs at the end of the first series (Fit the Sixth). On discovering the question, Arthur Dent remarks "I always said there was something fundamentally wrong with the universe.". Alternately, some have suggested that the question may be, "Pick a number, any number." Although this is not exactly a question, Marvin the Paranoid Android asks Zem the mattress in one of the books to pick any number, Zem says a number, and Marvin replies "Wrong. See?" Since he often complains that his brain is "the size of a planet," it is somewhat feasible that he could have discovered what Earth was supposed to find out. Also, Eddie the shipboard computer in one part of the books mentions, "Pick a number, guys!" but is ignored by the human inhabitants of the Heart of Gold. HAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAH awesome.... and, (again taken from a wikipedia entry, for "Meaning of Life" http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Meaning_of_life ) The number 42 as an answer to the question of the meaning of life is a reference to a joke in Douglas Adams's book The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. An advanced race of pandimensional beings builds a gigantic computer called "Deep Thought" to find the Answer to "Life! The Universe! Everything!". Seven million years later, the computer gave the answer: "42". After the answer was given, the pandimensional beings realized that they did not know the question and an even larger computer (the Earth) was built to find it, however the earth is destroyed moments before the final readout. The question is still found though, by Arthur Dent (one of the few that escaped the Earth's destruction). By taking random letters from a Scrabble set he gets: "What do you get when you multiply six by nine" (which involves some artistic licence, as the there are insufficient letters in an English Scrabble set to make up this sentence). Since 6 x 9 = 54, this being the question would imply that the universe is bizarre and irrational; on the other hand, there is no proof that this was the actual question. hahahahaha! so "what do you get when you multiply six by nine" ... define "six" as "1+5" Define "nine" as "8+1" multiply 1+5*8+1 order of opperations, 5*8 (40) 1+40+1 1+40 = (41) 40+1 40+1 = (42) 42 hahahahaha or you could do the base 13 thing... 6*9 in base 13 is 42 :P w00t! "nobody writes jokes in base 13!" the author dude of hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy -aliencam |W|P|110066037751085614|W|P|No one makes jokes in base 13!!|W|P|cameronk@gmail.com11/14/2004 10:47:00 PM|W|P|aliencam|W|P|"do you remember that one time we had an idea for a story line?" "no." "really? that was great." "i know, i was just pretending not to remember." "yeah." "yeah." "yeah." "no." "what?" "i dunno." "too bad that storyline never actualy existed." "yeah. it would have been great." "yeah. oh well." "wait... isn't this movie a sequel to the storyline?" "yeah." the end. that is a two hour movie i just watched. called "before sunset" ... the sequel to "before sunrise" ... i didn't see "before sunrise" but if it was anytyhing like this movie... well actualy, everyone who would have seen it owuld have killed themselves, so i guess there would be no one to criticise it, leaving room for a sequel... the entire movie was a conversation. there was no scene changes or anything... no one stood up... no one walked anywhere, no one yelled... it was a conversation... a conversation about something that happened, but do they tell us what it is?? no. more to say, but im not up to it... maybe i'll copy and paste the conversation in tomorrow... "it may be that some people's purpose is just that, to serve as someone with no purpose." -aliencam |W|P|110049845041366716|W|P||W|P|cameronk@gmail.com11/04/2004 11:07:00 PM|W|P|aliencam|W|P|well hello. again, i won't be able to write much, being that i was suposed to be in bed an hour ago and the fact that i'm grounded from the computer and lots of ohter reasons... lol ... but i'll try to write as much as i can in this short period of time.... lets see... today we had a half day at school, so i got home before 12:00... and i had the entire day to do stuff. so what did i do? i got on the computer, started some downloads, and then read and painted and "watched tv" (slept), untill dinner. then after dinner, my brothers wouldn't get off the computer to let me do my homework, and i didn't complain :P so i went and helped my mom with paypal stuff. Then i came back up, and my brothers got off and i started my Frankenstein thing, and then i decited that microsoft publisher is a weird program, so i stopped working... i started messing arround with stuff, and ended up downstairs watching CSI... then after it ended, i came up, got back on the comp and took some more of those stupid quizzes that for some reason are so fun... lol then i finally started on my Frankenstein thing, only i changed what i was going to do completly... instead of the timeline, i chose the "Write a paragraph describing some of the present-day attitudes towards using body parts to sustain life." and that was really easy, even if you didn't read the section, that was one that you could do. oh yeah, before that i went to school. :P what else... i feel a lot better again today, but lol its been every other day that i've felt like crap... i dunno why, but yeah... to tomorrow will probably be another day i feel like crap. okay well i have a headache (what else is new?) and i really should sleep so that i can get more than 3 hours of sleep and then fal asleep in the afternoon... my goal is 5 hours... i dont think i'll be able to get that much tho... lets see.. 11:40... plus the time it will take me to actualy get to bed... 12:15... plus the time it will take me to fall asleep... 1:30-2:00... and wake up at 4:57 (yes, my alarm is set for 4:57)... crap, most sleep i can get tonight is less than 5 hours... i want to say 4.5 but its actualy 3.5 which sounds like too little... oh well... i'm sure 10 days and 30 hours of sleep and a 24 hour migrane and a bunch of other stuff later i'll learn... bye!? oh yeah! i think it will be 3 posts so far that i won't have to edit anything out of! w00t! ... crap nevermind... *will restart count tomorrow* "i'll be back... with weapons..." -aliencam|W|P|109963699129618059|W|P||W|P|cameronk@gmail.com11/03/2004 10:00:00 PM|W|P|aliencam|W|P|bush won!!! okay thats enough happy. i feel like crap again today. well i did most of the day... not so much anymore... i don't feel like writing anything... so yeah "Alwalys remember that there will alwalys be a tomorrow... and that tomorrow is only one day closer to the apocolypse." -aliencam |W|P|109954480587665197|W|P||W|P|cameronk@gmail.com11/02/2004 10:38:00 PM|W|P|aliencam|W|P|okay, i actually did write a post yesterday, but i had to loose it because my dad yelled at me to go to bed... and i didn't even have time to save it or anything... yeah so that kinda sucked... i started painting again yesterday and its been helping me feel a lot better... kinda weird how i randomly start painting and thats all i do forever and then suddenly i stop and don't paint again for 6 months, then i pick up the paints again and paint for a week... lol i love painting... i still feel crappy though, i don't know why... i've tried virtually everything but oh well. i didn't cut myself today, so i guess thats an improvement. lol. made $20 today... which is a lot for me... i've been tutoring this lady in how to use the computer... today was the second time i went, and she improved from last time even though she didn't toucht he computer :P. she had never touched the computer before the other day, so she knew nothing... lol we were making fun of paul again today... sorry paul!... we were making fun of him yesterday too... ... hmm i need to try not to tomorrow, don't want paul to hate me completly... hmm... yeah, anyway i would say the story but that would be being mean to paul. so nope. sorry people who wanted to hear the story, but if you haven't already, just listen to coby, he still thinks it is funny to hint at it after we all said it out loud... i downloaded all of the orange range songs, except the ones i couldn't find... which would be most, so i donwloaded a few orange range songs...lol the bleach theme is so awesome... yeah... AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 269 to 211!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH ONE MORE AND WE WIN!!!!!! AAAAAHHHHHH JUST GIVE IT TO US!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i just decited that Austin's eyees are really creepy... actualy i decited that a looong time ago but i just said it. because he said he liked kerry and i said "well i want to poke out your eyes because they scare me" ... of course, people said my eyes were creppy too, but thats just bec they change colour... his eyes are really weird.. they scare me... its htose blue eyes that are like... weird... they are almost as scary as tara's eyes... but i'm not sure... bah barb knows something but she won't tell me... that hurts... w00t i'm head of the secret police in International Club... and i own Burkina Faoso and Cascadia! w00t "woah woah... hold up... you can BUY cds?" -aliencam |W|P|109946376536065753|W|P||W|P|cameronk@gmail.com